And more importantly, why is this never recognised as being vainer than self-confidence?
What I’ve never understood about society is the constant need to wear our inner most insecurities on our sleeves. Oh, listen to me, I am terrified of commitment, my parents have never showed love for me, I’m addicted to prescription drugs and my lack of confidence is making me want to rip out my insides. Would you like me to go into explicit detail about how I’m emotionally scarred while you chew your lunch?
Surely if we were that preoccupied with our insecurities, we wouldn’t be so ready to reveal them to other people. My head simply cannot compute why as a society, the fear of appearing arrogant is so much greater than expressing any amount of honest self-confidence. We’ve forced ourselves into an unneeded pit of misery which in fact, we’re digging deeper with every confession.
My idols and my own experiences have taught me to believe that if you consistently lie positively about yourself, you trick your mind into actually turning it into the truth. Unfortunately, the same goes for constantly adding a hateful disclaimer to everything you do. I have no doubt that these surprisingly confident revelations of private matters are honest, but because they have been tricked into to being so through repetition, not because they were born attached to us.
If anything, it is vainer to obsess so much about your “modest” appearance that you drive yourself into self-loathing, than it is to be happy about who you are. Isn’t it more arrogant to confess your inner and most personal fears to an acquaintance in order to attract the right kind of humble attention that it is to feel good about who you are, and not care what anybody else thinks of you? There are far too many people who I feel are suspiciously secure about their insecurities for me to believe that they didn’t want to seek anything other than an unpredictably deep conversation.
I hate this depressing culture. Breathe some life into your personalities and start to speak highly of yourself. Who knows, even if it starts out as a lie it might just turn into the truth.